Merry New Year to All, and to All a Good Afternoon

Last night, I chose to go to the New Year's celebration in Downtown Dallas. It was a lot of fun, but, mostly, it got me excited for this coming year. I can't guarantee how I'm going to change, what I'm going to see, or how I'm going to react, but I can guarantee that I will approach it with an open mind and an open heart. It's a strange feeling, standing at the edge of such a precipice as the four months in the Dominican Republic that await me. I cannot wait to leave, to get down there, but I want to stay. When I first got back, I felt frustrated and restless. I still feel that way because I'm ready to get off the sidelines and start actually making a difference. I can feel the weight of all my obligations here as I write letters for people next semester, which makes me hesitate. I'm sad to leave all those people behind, especially family, for such a long time.

However, yesterday morning, I awoke from a strange dream. I didn't know where I was, but, somehow, everyone I knew was in the same place. There were people from Carrollton, people from high school, people from Creighton, and my whole extended family. I went around, hugging people (of course) and saying goodbye before I left. When I started to reach the edge of the room, I started crying, because I realized everything I was leaving behind. I woke up with tears soaking into my pillow, but I woke up with a slightly different perspective. The only other time I had cried for that reason was on Freshman Retreat and on Encounter, when I started crying because I realized how lucky and fortunate I have been. It was the same sort of realization, of how blessed I have been with all the people I have met and befriended who have pushed me up to this point in my life. I couldn't have done it alone, and it would be an insult not to go through with this next semester and not realize my potential. So, I enter this New Year with a renewed determination to make the most of my time away from so many of those great people and with a rekindled desire to open myself fully to what lies ahead. As my Dad says, "I'm just waiting to hit my prime." I don't plan on peaking anytime soon, and this next semester will not be the pinnacle of my life, but a stepping stone to something bigger and something greater.

Gray